Glen Raphael - Cadbury Shanty

from by Various Artists

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My guilty pleasure is Cadbury Creme Eggs, a seasonal treat advertised with a rabbit mascot in commercials like this: www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yw_gEyg7Nt8

In recent years they colored the filling green to sell a halloween variant called Cadbury Screme Eggs.

This song is written in the style of a Sea Shanty with a sing-along chorus - it's an ode to my past nemesis

lyrics

I weighed too many pounds before I lost them
My diet has been very very great
It wasn't cutting carbs or fat or protein
My losses stem from something else I ate
It wasn't that my will was highly powered
I didn't lose to please a friend of mine
The secret of my health is told in hours
Of sad exposure limited in time. It was

Eggs! Cadbury! Sticky and sweet
No one has ever found better to eat
They are round, wrapped in silver foil
Some in this room, calling me down to my doom

I learned of them while sitting on my keister
A bunny rabbit crossed my tv screen
To say you'd only find these orbs 'til Easter
And then they never would again be seen
So now I knew my risk had boundary limits
Now I knew that risk had limit bounds
If dieting is hell then I was in it
To dream and then awaken to the sounds, of

Eggs! Cadbury! Sticky and sweet!
No one has ever found better to eat
They are round, wrapped in silver foil
Some in this room, calling me down to my doom

I flirted with disaster through the season
Then held my breath awaiting each return
That tiny Easter window was the reason
That I could eat so freely and not learn
That some things good in small amounts are poison
If then consumed a dozen times or more
For few can turn to many then to hundreds
And that is why my pancreas is sore, of

Eggs! Cadbury! Sticky and sweet
No one has ever found better to eat
They are round, wrapped in silver foil
Now sold in green, as a treat for Halloween

Just once a year was something I could handle
A sweet and special modicum of sin
But more exposure sent me through the bramble
That second window was what did me in
Though truthfully by then it didn't matter
Mere retail's not the only source of harm
Just sitting in my room I can get fatter
For there are eggs on Amazon dot com: bulk

Eggs! Cadbury! Sticky and sweet
No one has ever found better to eat
They are round, wrapped in silver foil
Some in this room, calling us down to our doom

To lose that weight I had to kick the habit
Of eating any food that I could find
I cursed the day I saw that evil rabbit
But in the end I repossessed my mind
To summon all the will that I could muster
I finally beat those eggs and whipped them well
If you would like to follow my example
I have a single message left to tell: avoid

Eggs! Cadbury! Sticky and sweet
No one has ever found better to eat
They are round, wrapped in silver foil
Some in this room, calling us down to our doom

credits

from SpinTunes #11: Round 2, released February 9, 2016

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Spintown Middletown, Ohio

I run a songwriting contest called SpinTunes. Most of the material hosted on this account is a result of that contest. You can follow the contest on Twitter (@SpinTunes) or my personal account (@Spintown).

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