As I'm browsing the web through the news and the blogs
I often feel lost and adrift in the sea
Through pages and pages of comments and posts
Everyone has an opinion but me.

A continual stream of content is added
The ratio of info to noise is too much
I wander this wilderness until I discover
An article or post blessedly untouched

To post first, the thrill of winning the rac
I post first; in all upper case
I post first into every blank space.
You think I'm a troll, but it's a salve to my soul,
to post first.

At the CERN conference among the foremost minds
Quantum Physics not too hard to understand
Yet when they ask 'are there any questions'
I cannot help but to raise my hand.

To post first, the thrill of winning the rac
I post first; in all upper case
I post first into every blank space.
You think I'm a troll, but it's a salve to my soul,
to post first.

It's quiet and dark and calm in this room
That my brother twin is sharing with me
9 months of peace and repose in the womb
There's only one reason that I'd ever leave.

I've got nothing to say, but I lust to be heard.
I get the last laugh when I have the first word.