So this is a true story. This really happened to me. The moral of the story is that you can't breathe under water. You should tell small children this.

Here's what happened: South Salt Lake circa 1976. I'm pretty sure I was 4 years old. My parents signed me up for swim lessons. This happens at the local High School swimming pool. I have my lesson in the shallow end with the class. Then there was some sort of "free swim" time. I wondered over to the deep end. I went deep under water exploring. I remember that I was naturally holding my breath, it was instinct. My chest started to hurt a bit. It occurred to me that I wasn't breathing. So I over intellectualized the situation. I consciously thought it was a good idea to take a deep breath (idiot). So I took a big deep breath of water. I passed out.
Next thing I remember my dad was all wet. I was coughing up water on the surface near the pool. My dad had been watching from he bleachers, ran down and dove in and pulled me out. The life guard/ head swim instructor ( a guy named Larry Swim , no joke) was hitting my chest to get me to cough up the water. My dad was furious at the program. I remember explaining to my dad my perspective. He said " why didn't they tell you , you can't breath under water!?"
I made it a point to tell both of my kids that they can't breathe under water, they can't fly, and if they're on fire, they need to stop, drop, and roll. I asked my kids about this yesterday. Bella is 10 now " duh, dad. Of course you can't breathe under water. You were kinda dumb." Django is 8 " I remember you telling me that dad, I'm glad you did, because it sure seems like you could breathe under water if you just tried"