Verse:
Can you help me, brother?
I’ve a tale of woe and strife
My name is Judge John Roberts
And I’m a’feared for my life

There’s a court for which I’m chief
It’s the highest in the land
When they put me here what I just did
Wasn’t ‘zactly what they planned

The Bush boys got me in this chair
And I ain’t Obama’s buddy
But my ruling on our healthcare
Made my future kinda muddy

Chorus:
Oh, brother, won’t you help me
Even though I can’t be fired
It’s only some cold comfort
When I’m on my funeral pyre

Verse:
No man I call my enemy
It’s the people that I serve
But there’s those I’m beholden to
Think I got a lotta nerve

The right think I’ve gone crazy
And left think that I’m right
My friends smile and say “it’s OK”
But they’re itchin’ for a fight

Chorus:
Oh, brother, won’t you help me
Even though I can’t be fired
It’s only some cold comfort
When I’m on my funeral pyre

Verse:
Scalia flew into a rage
And Thomas said “Me, too!"
Alito and Kennedy looked like
They’d like to run me through

My former friends are out for me
‘Cause of the way I’ve acted
I’d better hit the road
Before I find myself redacted

Chorus:
Oh, brother, won’t you help me
Even though I can’t be fired
It’s only some cold comfort
When I’m on my funeral pyre
It’s only some cold comfort
When I’m on my funeral pyre