MC Ohm​-​I - Down In Plankistan

from by Various Artists

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lyrics

I wanted to take a trip to the Arabian Peninsula
That's the Middle East for those of you who aren't into the
Geographical locations of Central Asia
But then my travel agent then told me something major

He said recently that there's a strange demand
To take vacations to the resorts in a strange new land
I thought the dude was jokin' and was playin', man
And then he told me the place was called Plankistan

I said, thank you man. And made my reservations
Hoping this new land would exceed my expectations
Of having a good time in a place that was distant
Little did I know that I'd amazed by it's existence

The moment I arrived the clock struck 12
And it looked like people were making a fool out themselves
And that's when I realized this was a strange little place
Cause everybody stopped just to lay on their face

Everywhere I go
Everybody's laying on their face fo' sho
I see them planking (down in Plankistan)
I see them planking (down in Plankistan)

From resort hotel rooms
All the way to the desert sand dunes
I see them planking (down in Plankistan)
I see them planking (down in Plankistan)

It appeared to me everyone near to me
Synchronized planks at the same time eerily
Then somebody whispered "Hey, you! You seem dumb!
Hurry and plank now before the police come!"

But it was too late. These policemen were mad buff
Three big dudes approaching me with handcuffs
They arrested me quick once I put my hands up
And took me to straight to their boss who they said ran stuff

The boss asked if I knew the local laws
I told him I didn't know and that I was appalled
That everyone lays on the ground in that strange fashion
He told me from now on to the take the same action

Cause if I got caught again breakin' the law
That they'd be breakin' my jaw and castratin' my balls
So when they let me go and the clock struck three
I had to stop walkin' 'round and get down on the street

Later that night, I went a club
To find a beautiful woman who would give me some love
When 9PM rang, everyone planked really hard
And I saw the sexiest girl planking on the bar

We talked a bit and then I brought my hotel
And it was around midnight and I thought "Oh well"
We'll be in my room and everything will be private
And nobody will see us not planking when the time hits

I shoulda known better cause when she was on top
And the clock struck 12 she decided to stop
And plank on me. So I thought I should remind her
That even though she stopped, that I was still inside her

I got tired of her planking and pushed her off
And she was looking lost and I got angered man
I caught the next plane out this strangest land
And never again did I visit Plankistan

credits

from SpinTunes #6: Round 1, released January 29, 2013

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I run a songwriting contest called SpinTunes. Most of the material hosted on this account is a result of that contest. You can follow the contest on Twitter (@SpinTunes) or my personal account (@Spintown).

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